Portside

I rowed competitively when I joined the old board and I was a stronger rower when rowing with a port side oar. Port is YOUR right, it's the coxswains left. Actually, I can row pretty well both sides - I'm "bisweptual." ;D Mike

Heck yeah - all the time - and the kids involved were teenagers. It was always our little inside joke and we'd just smile at each other. I never corrected any of the folks that mistakenly assumed some relationship that wasn't there. It would have been too difficult to accurately describe the relationship and honestly, it wasn't anyone's business anyway. Mike

Believe me, there is no set "how to" - once you decide if you two are going to blend families, you just sort of dive into it and learn as you go. I brought 4 sons into the mix, my wife brought two - a son and a daughter but only three of them still lived at home: The three oldest boys had already started their adult lives and are living on their own. We just started to do things together as a family before we were married but after (and only after) we knew we were going to have a future together. At first it was once or twice a week and, over time, we increased the frequency. Just doing the normal stuff - dinners, going to ball games, kid's plays, church, etc. Pretty soon we were acting like a family although we did not live together or combine households until after we were married. One of the biggest items to get a handle on is discipline. Are your styles similar? If they are not, I advise the two of you to sit down and hash the entire thing out. What is allowed, what is not - what are appropriate punishments (no - not consequences - I'm old school ;D) We are lucky, we had similar styles and it all meshed nicely. We also had no issue disciplining each others children if need be. Again, this worked well for us as the little scamps will play each of you off of each other if you give them half a chance. Don't fall into that - it's a recipe for disaster. We dated for a full 16 months or so before we were married and for us anyway, the kids knew from the start we were to be married at some point. By the time we were married, the kids had fully accepted the two of us both individually and together as a married couple. They also felt they were brother and sister and all that goes with that. Oh, one point not to be missed - for goodness sake, give a teenage girl her own bathroom if at all possible. There can be hell to pay if you don't. Good luck - Mike

15 Minutes run Every 2 Minutes x 5 Rounds: 3 Deadlifts 4 Rounds of: 10 Overhead Squats 12 Pull Ups :'(

A- Push Press: 5 Rounds: 1:30 min Per Round 3,3,2,2,1 B- Jerk: 5 Rounds: 1:30 min Per Round 2,2,2,1,1 12 Minutes worth of as many reps as possible: 10 Deadlifts 150 10 Pull Ups 5 Burpees every minute on the minute Have to admit, towards the end I was a wreck and it was all I could do to stand up. I have a long way to go - MIke

I am so sorry to hear of all of this - You are in my prayers Mary. Mike

Sure do! I have been remarried for a few years now to a woman that was not previously widowed. The fact that one of us has been widowed and the other not has not impacted us in the slightest. We both know we have a history of which the other was not a part. So? We love each other without limit or qualification and, as a result, can talk freely about what each of us has experienced before we met. It has never been an issue. My wife treats my children as her own - I do the same. We didn't have any blending issues with the kids at all. (Six in total). We have combined everything including our finances without incident or worries. Truly, it couldn't have been easier. I honestly do not see any value when dating to limit oneself to widow/ers or non-widow/ers. There are folks that are good for you and bad for you in each of those groups. But you do need to choose wisely. Good luck - Mike

Don't be - to be tempted is to be human. MIke

Time to get back into trim after winter. Was at the gym 4x this week with a new coach. Former pro footballer and now my strength coach. I hurt everywhere - I think even my hair hurts. But in a good way. Coming week's goal - 4x again and keep it up.

Excellent post Donna! I'm in too. Bought breakfast for a marine home on leave this morning without him knowing who did it. Loved his face when the waitress told him. Babysat (is there a better term for this?) one of my wife's special ed 1st graders so that her great-grandmother (her guardian) could get her hair done and have some alone time. We had a very nice tea party but my tiara wouldn't stay put. Mike

I had a wonderful time while dating online and eventually met my now wife on a specific interest dating site. I dated as often as time and finances allowed and learned at least one valuable thing from every woman I went out with. If I read a profile I found interesting, I always approached it the same way: I sent the woman a message saying, "I found your profile interesting - please take a look at mine and let me know if you feel the same." and let it go at that. I was asking the woman what she thought. All folks love to be asked their opinion. I had very good results with this approach. I don't think I had positive results due to my stunning good looks - because I don't have them. However, I spent a great deal of effort crafting my profile. It's marketing boys and girls, don't forget that. You must position yourself in the best possible light while not building a house of cards by lying. Notice there is very little pressure in my request. I'm not asking (directly) if there is a match, if you like me, or if you want to go out. Nothing of the kind. Rather, I'm asking 'do you find my profile (not me) interesting?' The unstated is 'if there is, we'll take if from there.' And I did. No doubt about it, dating is hard when you are middle aged - it's not for sissies. Good Luck, Mike

I suppose it was around 3 months or so. I never seemed to suffer any of the crippling, suck-the-wind-out-of-you days that many have (after the first week or so). I was lucky. I've always been the type of person to try to place whatever crap sandwich was in front of me behind me as quickly as humanly possible and also, I think I'm older than most here and have seen most of the misery the world has to offer before. It may have stung less because of that. In any case, I started to rebuild my life without my late wife right away. I was concerned for my children and wanted to try to have as normal a family existence as possible as soon as possible for their sake. Certainly not everyone's cup of tea but that's how I approached it. Oh, there were certainly those days that just sprung up out of nowhere where I thought "Damn!". But they were very infrequent and tapered off to nothing in about 2 months. Best wishes, Mike

Yep - Son's #2 and #4 had ear tubes put in after multiple ear infections. The antibiotics didn't take care of the infections at all - they drank Amoxicillin like it was soda. After the tubes, no more infections and happy boys! (and Dad).

I'm Mike. My late wife died by means of a self-inflicted GSW to the chest almost 8 years ago. She suffered from crippling mental illness for 18 years and it eventually overcame her ability to fight it. I raised my four sons then by myself and they have all moved on now to the adult stage of their lives. Two in the working world, one in college and my youngest in the Navy. Through the grace of God they've all turned out to be happy and compassionate young men. Best wishes to all, Mike