imissdow Posted November 26, 2016 Share Posted November 26, 2016 Klim: I had a second date with a really nice guy on Friday a week ago. I heard from him on Monday, a text message or 2 on Tuesday and Thursday and then nothing. Not sure if I should be moving on or thinking I will hear from him. 2 dates hardly make a relationship. Yet here I sit wondering if I've been kicked to the curb. Typically guys go way faster then I'm comfortable with and are way to attentive. Yet I find myself not liking this either. Oh to find a guy I click with and have enough contact to make me feel comfortable with. Maybe I'm asking for to much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted November 26, 2016 Share Posted November 26, 2016 thanks for an input Oh I don't jump to boyfriend mode ...I am very very slow on the connection factor What I worry about( a bit) is whether I mislead guys because I can have a pleasant conversation with people I don't even like. Imisswidow...at this point just to nudge I would send a blank text...see if that jumps starts any response......or if you're brave you just send the text....hey what's up? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nonesuch Posted November 27, 2016 Share Posted November 27, 2016 Sometimes the meet and greet was enough, and we'd shake hands and one or the other of us would say, "Nice meeting you, but I don't think we have enough in common." Sometimes if he asked me out again, I'd say it then. I had a three date rule: If I didn't feel some kind of connection or appeal by the third meeting, I would turn down another date. Sometimes I didn't have to: sometimes HE didn't call again. I had about 31 meet and greets, few second dates, third dates I could count on one hand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted November 27, 2016 Share Posted November 27, 2016 Thanks for explaining a bit more, klim -- as someone who is not the best conversationalist straight away, I admire those who are at ease like it sounds you are! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted December 1, 2016 Share Posted December 1, 2016 ok had a doozie tonight.... yesterday I was talking to a fellow on POF...figured out he went to the same university and was in the same program I was in. Of course there were 300 people in the program so not surprising we didn't really know of each other , but I did have an old picture from the graduating class photos and found his name so could see who he was. today he gives me his phone number so i text him. half an hour later he gives me a call. it starts off pretty normal but he seems really hyped up.....I'm intrigued but almost in a he is really bizarre way.....but an intelligent bizarre way....so I keep on talking. At some point I beginning to suspect that he is just looped . either drunk or high. He asks me a rather suggestive question and I snap a one word answer at him and then.........i think he passed out. Half an hour later he phones...I'm not answering he texts "why are you mad at me?".....phoned 2 more times after that. ...... one of those people that I'm glad showed there true colours early.....jeez what a nutcase. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 1, 2016 Share Posted December 1, 2016 Wow, klim! Yes, thankfully you were able to sleuth out who he was and that there were some issues at work there. So sorry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imissdow Posted December 1, 2016 Share Posted December 1, 2016 Someone on here once said when people fly their "freak flag "believe them. I want to say it was robtc ? That phase has stuck with me and really helped me not try to rationalize away so pretty weird/different behavior that I couldn't deal with. I'm also a person who believes we all have our own " freak show" behavior. I work in a male dominated job so I've been told that makes me odd. So it's really about finding what works for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted December 2, 2016 Share Posted December 2, 2016 "When someone shows you who they are believe them the first time. " Maya Angelou That's hard advice to follow. Actions speak louder than words yet we fall for their words first. I'm currently living this. NG said all the right things but his actions were the opposite. Nice guy, poor timing, and emotionally unavailable. I'm moving on. Since I stopped communicating with him four men have contacted me. Three on Facebook, which I think is funny. It's almost like a dating site. The fourth is a man who I dated from January to August, off and on fwb. I think he's wanting more. We have a lot in common, have a great time together, but I can't picture us long term. #1 and #2, not interested. #3 I agreed to get together with soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 2, 2016 Share Posted December 2, 2016 Great point, Jen -- and hope things go well with #3! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted December 2, 2016 Share Posted December 2, 2016 Was rainy around here the other night so I mentioned it in an exchange. 18 hours later the guy told me he was out driving in the rain right now. ...it was clear and sunny out at this point so I asked him what he was doing Answer: "I was driving around road patrolling for the city. Looking for damage or safety issues" I'm thinking he doesn't live in my city like his profile says. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 2, 2016 Share Posted December 2, 2016 Oh my, klim Do you have his phone number? I used to check area codes and ask them how come their phone number is associated with [X city and state] and the profile says they live in [Y city and state]. Some would vanish, some would get indignant (had one guy ask me why having a # from somewhere else was an issue and get huffy, then disappear), and some would answer right back that they used to live in that one place and since there was still family there, they kept the same #. However, the weather claim is a new one to me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imissdow Posted December 2, 2016 Share Posted December 2, 2016 Omg! I just checked my message requests on Facebook. Earlier this week I deleted a friend request from a guy in Pakistan. He also sent me a message request and a marriage proposal. Even included a phone number. Oh my!! That's the second marriage proposal this year! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted December 3, 2016 Share Posted December 3, 2016 wow Imissdow....think you could have been married twice already!!!! seriously does that ever work??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tybec Posted December 3, 2016 Share Posted December 3, 2016 NG is still waiting on his green card, he tells me! Had a bunch of them at first on-line! A Meme I received: In reality, all girls (and guys) are crazy, so you just better pick your favorite kind! Yuppers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nonesuch Posted December 4, 2016 Share Posted December 4, 2016 Oh my, klim Do you have his phone number? I used to check area codes and ask them how come their phone number is associated with [X city and state] and the profile says they live in [Y city and state]. I haven't met a single person, ever, who changed his or her phone number voluntarily. Most try to keep whatever mobile number they have and port it from one carrier to another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 4, 2016 Share Posted December 4, 2016 Sure, people do that. I know a few people, myself included, who changed phone numbers when I moved. I ditched my Jersey number for one in California not too long after I got here and have family who have done that when they moved as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imissdow Posted December 4, 2016 Share Posted December 4, 2016 Sometimes just asking is enough. Had a guy give me his number it was a philly area code. My one of my sisters live there so I recognized it right away. I asked about it he told me he had moved. I asked a question about what his favorite place to visit was. It took awhile for him to get back to me and then he picked a well known tourist trap. Sooo did you google that? If you put a phone number in the search box for Facebook, can bring up their profile. Had a it guy tell me this after he found out my last name and were I lived. Was a tad creepy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted December 4, 2016 Author Share Posted December 4, 2016 Gotta love some scammers for entertainment! Tinder match with a B level celebrity. I didn't notice until he mentioned it. He is engaged to a super model but things are "not going well" and is looking for someone "different and genuine". Women there only want him for his money and sex. I told him I didn't have interest in his money but sex would be good. 😁 Said he was deleting the app and wanted to communicate off site. Told him I messaged his Facebook page and to reply to me there! (I actually did with a screen shot of the conversation. Not sure if they can go after him or not but thought I would try.) He said I was ignorant and insulted him! Yet, he kept trying! Pure entertainment I tell you! I couldn't stop laughing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 5, 2016 Share Posted December 5, 2016 That is rich, momto (pun intended) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 5, 2016 Share Posted December 5, 2016 Just a random share of what one of my friends would call a junior high moment in the world of dating: So NG is in another state for work just now. We had Thanksgiving at my house; it was the first time in five years that he hadn't cooked for himself. I invited his daughter and granddaughter as well but they went to her mother's this year. He said it seems she's alternating holidays as she spent last Thanksgiving with him. Anyway, we were going to get together for a movie night on Saturday but the weather was so horrible that he didn't come over and we didn't go out. I felt some type of way for a moment but after snuggling in because the rain had gotten fierce, I got over it quickly. Anyway, it turns out the job called him out of state (second time in about three weeks). A few days after he left, he texts to say he was sorry we hadn't gotten together. Fast forward to yesterday. I posted on social media about getting a friend request from some random alleged widowed guy who I didn't know and who wasn't connected to anyone I know. I made a joke of deleting the request. I had a bunch of friends make jokes and so on. NG pops in and posts that the guy better back off. ;D ;D I replied with something like, 'Exactly -- that's what I'm saying'. He put smileys and said he'd be home in a week. Giggle. Thanks for letting me share and hope you're all having a good weekend! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted December 5, 2016 Author Share Posted December 5, 2016 Was rainy around here the other night so I mentioned it in an exchange. 18 hours later the guy told me he was out driving in the rain right now. ...it was clear and sunny out at this point so I asked him what he was doing Answer: "I was driving around road patrolling for the city. Looking for damage or safety issues" I'm thinking he doesn't live in my city like his profile says. Yes klim... I tried a new app. Bagel meets coffee. It's supposed to be more about communication and no swiping based on looks. Started a pleasant conversation. I asked what part of the city he lives in as it states he lives in my city. He says a town almost an hour west. I say not XXX then (my city). He says here in my city. I say his town is almost an hour away. POOF! He vanished! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobFTC Posted December 9, 2016 Share Posted December 9, 2016 Did anyone hear an announcement for Catfishing Friday? It must be - I woke up with three expressions of interest today: - an OKCupid message from a 29-year-old in Wide-Spot-In-The-Road or something Wyoming who would like me to contact her - off-site at an e-mail address with a Russian domain name - sounds legit :-) - a fave and a like on match.com from two different lovely women, ages 30 and 31, in Casper, Wyoming - who happen to have included the same Gmail address for further contact. I guess it was too hard to yell across the boiler room to coordinate who was going to use the "rossewewa" account today. Did I mention the profiles were word-for-word the same, too? I should point them to each other, they'd get along well! Ready to get off of all these sites in 3... 2... 1... Take care, Rob T Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 9, 2016 Share Posted December 9, 2016 Oh, Rob! Sigh ... they just don't quit, do they? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kjs1989 Posted December 9, 2016 Share Posted December 9, 2016 Ack, it is so unfortunate there are so many scammers, questionable motive types, and issue laden people on these sites. I lucked out and met someone "normal," as have many friends and acquaintances, but the process can sure take a lot out of a person in the meantime. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted December 9, 2016 Share Posted December 9, 2016 Agreed, kjs -- the first person I met turned out to be a faker. A couple guys after that ghosted or tried to tell me how to start a relationship by rushing me to meet. Never do that to an introvert. I ended up on a site in late May and like you, met a normal guy. The end of this month will be six months that we've been involved Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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