widowat33 Posted April 25, 2015 Share Posted April 25, 2015 ((Just Jen)) Trust me, you are not the only one worried about that! I do get the "you're young you will find someone else" comments, but only because I'm young, I truly don't think it has anything to do with people believing that I am that great of a prize that I will have men beating down my door,lol. Maybe no one has made that comment for the mere reason that the people in your life know that it's not exactly the most sensitive comment to make to someone who has lost their spouse, because honestly it isn't something that I enjoyed hearing. I also worry that I will be alone the rest of my life. I live in a small community where all the single men are either: old enough to be my grandpa ( nothing against older men, but...), young enough to be my child ( not quite, but close), or single for a reason (meaning, not exactly relationship material)! Honestly at this point I am too busy, too tired and just not ready for any kind of relationship with another man. I'm working on finding myself, discovering who I am now that my 'other half' has been taken from me, and taking care of my own happiness...but I still worry that when the time is right for me, I won't be able to find someone. And around here if you do have a casual fling, everyone knows about it by the next day, so for my own reputation and for my kids sake even that is not possible! The thing is once you've loved and been loved, it's very hard to lose that and think that you will never find that again! I know this is a sex thread and I've kind of went off topic, but yeah part of a relationship is obviously the sex, which in my opinion or at least in my relationship was a very important part. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest IronBear Posted April 25, 2015 Share Posted April 25, 2015 Lately, just the sound of a female voice makes me hard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carey Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 I get a LOT of sex. Which is strange. WAY more than when I was married (OMG this feels TMI). He's a fwb and I know it's not going to end happily ever after. And I'm afraid that spending all my time with him and getting IRRITATED when others ask me out is stunting me and keeping me from looking for someone I can actually be with. I feel safe and can ask for anything sexually and get it, and feel pretty free giving too and "starting over" with someone else feels like it'd push me over the edge to insanity. If you gotta ruin your own life I guess it's easier if it feels good lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 Carey- I agree that being in a fwb situation makes it less likely that you will start looking for someone interested in a relationship. BUT, maybe you're not ready for a relationship yet. My fwb situation is on a break for now. It was good for the short time it lasted, but it changed for me. I'm not saying I wouldn't consider another fwb situation, but more than likely not with him. I'm leaning more toward dating, but just a little scared to take that first step. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest look2thesky Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 FWB seems to end weird. Not saying it doesn't satisfy an urge but someone always seems to want more or get hurt. Oh well back to the drawing board. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonnaP Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 I shouldn't admit that, I guess, but if I can't be candid in this thread, where can I? I'm 40 years old. My husband died; my libido didn't. I mean I am seriously, deeply afraid that I'm never going to be touched again. The idea that I might have to spend another 40 years celibate-- never any sex at all, let alone the kind I want-- is nearly as devastating to me as the fact of Jim's death. That probably makes me a terrible, jacked up person in need of professional help, but-- fuck it, I have to wear the mask everywhere else, I may as well lay it all out here. Hope no one will hold it against me. And if they do, well, I'm sorry. It's just where I am. No need to apologize for your feelings. We are all human. I was in my later forties when my husband (50) died. I had many of the same thoughts. Who could I possibly find who'd want me (an aging, wrinkled, past-her-prime mother of two...). But guess what? Lightning DID strike again for me. And it can for you too, so long as you are open to that idea. Good luck. And may the force be with you ... HUGS, Donna Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest IronBear Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 I am a huge fan of FWB. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mac Posted April 29, 2015 Share Posted April 29, 2015 The 40's are an amazing time! Glad to know I'm not the only one who can't seem to get enough. It's like being a teenager except now I know so much more and have way more confidence. Not to mention that a 45 year old man is much more giving than an 18 year old! The 50's are pretty amazing too! Grateful for that! I'm guessing that FWB wouldn't be a good choice for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted May 5, 2015 Share Posted May 5, 2015 I would just really like to be held. Rest my head on a guy's chest and be swallowed up in his arms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CBB Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 Ditto , ditto and more ditto..Scared to death to even try . 50 is lurking and I am freaking out! The websites really scare me and from what I have seen , I may have to join a convent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted May 17, 2015 Share Posted May 17, 2015 According to my dreams lately...I need sex. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gracelet Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 This thread has been so tame compared to the YWBB equivalent... Describe those dreams!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted May 20, 2015 Share Posted May 20, 2015 I couldn't sleep last night because I couldn't stop thinking about... stuff. Sorry, Grace, I'm at work and can't go into detail, but... it was vivid. Cold shower, anyone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jess Posted May 20, 2015 Share Posted May 20, 2015 Just wondering if Jen is home from work yet... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissingSquish Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 I need an amazing bear hug and naked cuddle with Squish, wrapping his body around mine and making me feel safe. And then it needs to stop after a few minutes because both of our shoulders are going numb. Actually I also miss the way he used to brush and braid my hair. Sent tingles down my spine. Or a goodnight kiss and to let me fall asleep alone but when I'd wake up in the middle of the night, he was there, sleeping next to me. I guess this isn't about sex much at all. Just missing him tonight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singinmomo4 Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 I guess this isn't about sex much at all. Just missing him tonight. I hear ya MS. I know not the hugs you want, but (((((HUGS))))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissingSquish Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 Thanks M. Sending a hug back your way too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lcoxwell Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 Okay, I have spent the last three days in bed, feeling tingly all over, and being poked and prodded, and there was not a bit of sex to be had in any of it. If it weren't for the fact that half my body is numb, I could use a really good, old fashioned roll in the hay, if for no other reason than to make sure all my parts still work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baylee627 Posted May 22, 2015 Share Posted May 22, 2015 I could use a really good, old fashioned roll in the hay, if for no other reason than to make sure all my parts still work. Heard that;) Baylee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted May 23, 2015 Share Posted May 23, 2015 Just wondering if Jen is home from work yet... Back at work today, still trying to crush every erotic thought that occurs to me. It won't. Go. Away. I've considered doing something completely irresponsible and looking for a hook up on Craig's List or something, but I'm too scared. I don't know how to deal with this. What will win out, fear or sex? This desperation terrifies me. I hate feeling out of control, but I need-- something. I can't get it. I'm so tired, I wish I could just turn my brain off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted May 24, 2015 Share Posted May 24, 2015 Do you know anyone that would be up for a FWB situation Jen? That way it would be someone you know and a safe. It's hard. I feel the same way. I started a FWB situation, but we didn't get very far (no intercourse.) It just didn't feel right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swilson Posted May 24, 2015 Share Posted May 24, 2015 Sorry ladies, I'm feeling really mischievous tonight; http://www.magicmikemovie.com/ That should add fuel to the smoldering embers :-* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lcoxwell Posted May 24, 2015 Share Posted May 24, 2015 Swilson, you are such a hoot! ;D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted May 24, 2015 Share Posted May 24, 2015 Joe is mine ladies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lcoxwell Posted May 24, 2015 Share Posted May 24, 2015 Virgo, I will gladly relinquish Joe to you. I don't need a man, who is better looking than I am. I just need an average, normal man, with working parts and a desire to make me feel really good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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