DavidsKtBeth Posted August 14, 2015 Share Posted August 14, 2015 FUCK my life.. This blows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted August 15, 2015 Author Share Posted August 15, 2015 This blows. It both blows and sucks, which shouldn't even be possible. (((HUGS)))) Now then... ahem... Fuck every tactless twat who gushes at me, "You look GREAT, what's your diet secret???" I tell them they don't want to know, and still they press it. Fine. Step one: get a call telling you that your beloved spouse has basically dropped dead on the living room floor. Step two: stop eating for six months. Step three: gradually reintroduce food, but not food you particularly like, because nothing tastes great anymore, so you might as well eat chicken and bran flakes as anything else. Step four: walk. Walk endlessly, because your brain is so jacked up and your heart hurts so much that you can't sit still, you can't concentrate on movies or tv or books, so you walk because it's pretty much the only way to get from the alarm going off in the morning to the light being (finally!!) turned off at night. Sound good? I call it the Bereavement Diet, and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Yeah, I've lost a chunk of weight and had to buy new clothes. I do not look "great." I look saggy, sad, and defeated, because-- guess what?-- I AM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenHeart2 Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 Fuck Em all! Stupid nonsense and stupid people! Fuck Em! Blows and sucks is right. Yup, I'm feeling a tad of anger right now. Thanks for letting me spew it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenHeart2 Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 double post, not sure why, par for the course in my stupid ship try life I guess! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donswife Posted August 17, 2015 Share Posted August 17, 2015 yup just fuck this whole widowhood thing not you guys.... but all the rest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted August 20, 2015 Share Posted August 20, 2015 Fuuuuuuuck you to the people who offer help or say they can help when asked and then don't follow through or can't actually deliver. And then there's the people who never offer assistance at all any more because of course everything is peachy keen here. It's no wonder I hate asking for help so much- I put myself out there and am still left hanging. Is it really too much to ask for something to go right once in a while? Haven't we had enough of this? FU, universe! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pammierae7363 Posted August 26, 2015 Share Posted August 26, 2015 Fuck that his birthday is next week and I'm buying fucking flowers for his fucking grave instead of the cool new ham radio gadget or a new Steelers jersey or whatever else would make his eyes light up. Fuck that the birthday dinner will just be me and his mom and not a big party with friends and family. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THATgurl Posted September 20, 2015 Share Posted September 20, 2015 Fuck just everyone and a bunch of all it all? The more I progress the more I realize I need to just say "fuck all y'all. wanna have coffee?" I do think that part of this young widow thing is being old before our time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
biscuit Posted September 21, 2015 Share Posted September 21, 2015 Fuck everyone who has an opinion about where we should be in our grief without having experienced it themselves Fuck everyone who I see for the first time since Wayne's death who ask me how life is and what am I up to these days? (um..barely surviving and going crazy) and finally fuck the blissful ignorance of all the happily engaged couples around me who just cant believe how lucky they are and make sure everyone knows it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted October 4, 2015 Author Share Posted October 4, 2015 Fuck all this shit. Fuck that fucking isn't in my fucking future. Fuck this empty bed. Fuck it all. :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenHeart2 Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Yup! Fuck it al!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brenda Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 Fuck all this shit. Fuck that fucking isn't in my fucking future. Fuck this empty bed. Fuck it all. :( Not sure anyone can beat that statement in terms of "high fuck content". But yeah, I'll raise a glass to that. And again and again until the whole bottle is gone, because there's no fucking in my future either. Sucks, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donswife Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Fuck that tomorrow would be his birthday fuck that this is the first time in 27 years that I will not have him here to celebrate Fuck that this time last year we were on vacation , one of the best ones we ever had fuck that I am still baking his birthday cake tonight because if I didn't it would break my heart Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 Fuck that tomorrow would be his birthday fuck that this is the first time in 27 years that I will not have him here to celebrate Fuck that this time last year we were on vacation , one of the best ones we ever had fuck that I am still baking his birthday cake tonight because if I didn't it would break my heart (((((((((HUGS)))))))))))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest fern Posted October 9, 2015 Share Posted October 9, 2015 OMG this. Old before our time. I feel like I've jumped right from early middle age to elderly. FUCK THAT I do think that part of this young widow thing is being old before our time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted October 11, 2015 Author Share Posted October 11, 2015 Fuck this roller coaster. Fuck that I'm almost happy for about five minutes, then it all goes to hell again. Fuck that I have to keep visiting this thread. Fuck that I look every minute of my 41 years, and then some. Fuck that it doesn't fucking matter because no one will ever look at me again anyway. Fuck that I give and give and there is no one to take care of me. Fuck that I still need someone to take care of me, but every time I look for a rock it just crumbles. FUCK. IT. ALL. ETA: Is it just my morbid sense of humor, or is it strangely fitting that this is my 666th post? Fuck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catnip Posted October 20, 2015 Share Posted October 20, 2015 Fuck that my hair is now turning gray. Fuck that I know why-it's this stressful widow journey I've been on for the last 8 years. Fuck my hairdresser who's becoming fucking rich because of me. Or rather, bless her for at least trying to cover it up. Fuck her for never losing her job while I'm around. Fuck that I love and hate her all at the same time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catnip Posted October 20, 2015 Share Posted October 20, 2015 Fuck the fall. Why do all those leaves have to fall in my yard? Why don't they go away and melt like the snow does? Oh fuck, winter is right around the corner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donswife Posted October 21, 2015 Share Posted October 21, 2015 Fuck that I have already had to put the heat on and I forget how to work the timer thingy on the thermostat Fuck that it is now getting dark so early fuck that I will have to start getting everything ready for the winter which I am terrified is coming Fuck that I am so fucking grouchy lately , I don't even like hanging out with myself sometimes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brenda Posted October 22, 2015 Share Posted October 22, 2015 You know what? Fuck me. Fuck me for being thoroughly incapable of getting my shit together, finding a job, and not being such a complete loser. I'm tired of blaming my wife's death on my current situation; it's my fault now. So fuck me for being so pathetic and fucking everything up. I fucking hate this. I fucking hate myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDan Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fuck my job fuck this shit hole house that I paid way too much for fuck my car fuck this whole fucking state fuck me fuck ME for being a terrible mother and wife, fuck me for ever trusting anyone fuck this whole fucking ride called life that I've never been any good at I want off. I want off now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest fern Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 Fuck that it is autumn and that means getting the woodstove going to heat the house in the morning and dealing with the wood and chopping kindling and my husband did all that. It's going to be an expensive space-heater-in-every-room kind of winter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 Fuck that it is now getting dark so early fuck that I will have to start getting everything ready for the winter which I am terrified is coming Seriously. Game of Thrones has the whole "Winter is Coming". I have that ominous voice in my head now all the time. Winter is coming. Fuuuucck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
First Widow Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 Fuck that it is autumn and that means getting the woodstove going to heat the house in the morning and dealing with the wood and chopping kindling and my husband did all that. It's going to be an expensive space-heater-in-every-room kind of winter. Seriously, fuck this! I am so overwhelmed thinking about everything my husband did in the winter, FUCK winter! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted October 24, 2015 Author Share Posted October 24, 2015 Fuck that tomorrow I have to put on a brave face and look happy while my pregnant sister marries a man with my dead husband's name. Fuck that she now gets to live the life that was supposed to be mine. Fuck that Jim's not here to hold my hand and make snarky comments about her and her groom just to make me laugh. He's supposed to be here. HE IS SUPPOSED TO FUCKING BE HERE FOR ALL THESE STUPID FUCKING MILESTONES. Instead, I'm going with my mother. At least my daughter has a date... Oh, and fuck that NOT ONE PERSON IN MY FAMILY has apparently given a moment's thought to how hard this is for me. I know, I know, it's not about me, but goddammit-- !!! We need a Mobile Wid Support Unit to show up and escort us to these events. Could someone make that happen, please? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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