Needytoo Posted January 26, 2017 Share Posted January 26, 2017 I joined Our Time, DO NOT BOTHER. It is a scam. You get randomly generated emails from guys. I think you are all right about "texter from a far". "Window face squisher" has made me his favorite on POF. I wish someone would set me up with a blind date. Only had one person suggest it to me and then took it back and said she would feel bad if it didn't turn out. I do like the idea of a Matchmaker, there is one in the area, but I don't think she has a very active service and she is very expensive. How much is yours Matchmaker trying2breathe. I know this one lady who use to put on over 40 single dances, but she stopped. She said guys would call her and asked if she would guarantee that they would get laid if they went. What is going on with the world? Speaking of that my ex-husband contacted me through Facebook. Haven't spoken or seen him in 27 years. He apologized to me for how awful he treated me. It has been interesting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 We live in a strange world, Needy (as an eHarmony add plays in background ... 'we found our best match in life' says one of the people on there) ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted January 27, 2017 Author Share Posted January 27, 2017 Klim, "do the rest of you feel like online dating brings in a certain type of person?" I'm not really sure. Yes, there are lots of creeps, married people, losers, those that have no intention of ever meeting, those you think couldn't find a date any way else. But, then there are us. We are none of the above. Maybe there are less of us but we are there. Is it just harder to find those like us because there are less of us? It's hard to meet people in real life. At least for me. Single men my age just don't appear in front of me daily. I've been trying to meet people off line. I went Salsa dancing a few weeks ago and I went to a singles dance last weekend. No luck. I have more funny stories though. I may post them here soon! Needytoo, I have had the same reaction when I asked a few people to set me up. Initially they loved the idea and then they felt uncomfortable in case something went wrong. This blind date yesterday was from my hairdresser's daughter. Long story but she was so sweet and excited about it! Ironically I find her brother very intriguing but he is 10 years younger than me and I never saw it as an option. Yesterday she told me he just started dating someone 1 year older than me! Go figure! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RyanAmysMom Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 Got a message from a man today online who clearly stated that he wouldn't be available to actually "date" for 7 months because he was on a state-sponsored vacation, but he'd be happy to text at any time. > Seriously. It even had a pic of him in his cell......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemperFidelis Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 Had my teeth cleaned a few days ago, my dental hygienist is so full of information on on-line dating. All her children found their partners that way. She is so inspirational. This just made me smile. Inspiration comes from the strangest places sometimes doesn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemperFidelis Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 Well it's past my bedtime so I will keep this short. NG2 and I have been seeing each other for 3.5weeks now after meeting off Match. Folks, I am so excited. Like genuinely "holy shit I found the glass fucking slipper". That kinda thing. More than ever I know it can fall apart in the blink of an eye and I know shit can flip and he could be Looney. But for now I'm getting excited.... Could not really do that with NG1. Ng2 actually is reminding me a bit of LH.....in all the right ways. I feel at home with him......and he feels at home with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
First Widow Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 Good luck with NG2 Semper! I finally got beyond the window shopping phase and put a pic on my profile the other night and it's been entertaining at least. Thanks to whoever mentioned Google image searching because the one guy I did find relatively attractive turned out to be a scamner or a serial online dater because his result came up as scam artist and all he had were bimbos for FB friends. LOL Chatted with another guy last night but he wished me luck when he realized I was an hour away. Will keep at it, if for nothing else than to get more material for the book we're publishing. 8) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trying2breathe Posted January 27, 2017 Share Posted January 27, 2017 I don't know I think its just the inorganic nature of it......it takes time to form an opinion. I'd like to think that I can get to know him better - I shouldn't base my opinion on whether to meet him in person, on a less than inspiring phone call. It's hard to get intrigued when all he talked about are his dogs. ho hum - As for a matchmaker - I treated myself for my birthday. The interviewer analyzed my situation, brought out the price list and I paid more than I probably should have. Matchmaking vs. on-line dating is similar in that clients go through on-line profiles and decide whether they'd like to meet somebody or not. The match then decides whether or not to follow through and meet. What I see that is different about a service vs. on-line is that with this matchmaker, everybody is background checked, vetted and deemed to be interested in dating. I do feel a sense of security with the guys that I have met, so far. Next week I'll attend a singles trivia party at a fondue restaurant, sounds like fun. So far I've had more success at the events, rather than choosing on-line matches. Inorganic vs. organic - I get it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted January 27, 2017 Author Share Posted January 27, 2017 SunshineFL, you are one lucky lady but.... He is one luckier fella! 💓 Pipeline engingeer and all! 😁 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Needytoo Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 I am so happy for everyone that has found a relationship. I agree with Kilm, there is something inorganic about this online dating thing. I changed my profile, and main photo and bunch of guys check out my profile again, and I got two responses. One of the pictures is of me with my sons, and we are wearing our sunglasses. My boys are body builders, and they have the popeye arms. One guy made a comment. Read his profile, and he seemed interesting. I asked if he had kids and what does he like to do with his free time. His reply was "I have no kids, and I mind my own business." Wow, buddy. Got another message from a "widower" that contacts me ever time I change my picture. Not sure if he is an engineer? I really like the idea of a matchmaker. I heard somewhere the local one here fee is $800. We do have speed dating events too. Or maybe I should try Match again. Decisions, decisions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted January 28, 2017 Share Posted January 28, 2017 RyanAmysMom -- Noooooo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemperFidelis Posted January 29, 2017 Share Posted January 29, 2017 Sunshine, big congrats. I love to hear what a beautiful thing you are experiencing. I think probably most of us met our late spouses organically instead of online....so I think most of us can relate to that feeling. I will never forget the process of spying my husband early on and getting so excited at each juncture to get closer and closer to him. Its just a different way of getting to know someone compared to online. You get to enjoy some mystery in the beginning. So cool. So enjoy it for the rest of us out here doing the online thing ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 I'm not online dating, but most of my dates contact me through Facebook. Probably poor timing for the two I'm talking to. Bachelor #1 separated from his wife in October. It was just finalized a few weeks ago. Bachelor #2 recently ended an 8 month relationship. I enjoy talking to both. I have been out with Bachelor #1 a few times. That's my update. We'll see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momof2obs Posted February 2, 2017 Share Posted February 2, 2017 I'm not online dating, but most of my dates contact me through Facebook. Probably poor timing for the two I'm talking to. Bachelor #1 separated from his wife in October. It was just finalized a few weeks ago. Bachelor #2 recently ended an 8 month relationship. I enjoy talking to both. I have been out with Bachelor #1 a few times. That's my update. We'll see. Gee, the only thing I got from Facebook was a bunch of phony friend requests once it went out that I was newly widowed! I wish you well! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest wecouldbeheros Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 It's strange how friend requests are linked to people on dating sites. Never liked the "oh I heard you were widowed" lines. Like I came into a huge amount of money. Take away the debt, not as pretty as I thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 I'm not online dating, but most of my dates contact me through Facebook. Probably poor timing for the two I'm talking to. Bachelor #1 separated from his wife in October. It was just finalized a few weeks ago. Bachelor #2 recently ended an 8 month relationship. I enjoy talking to both. I have been out with Bachelor #1 a few times. That's my update. We'll see. Gee, the only thing I got from Facebook was a bunch of phony friend requests once it went out that I was newly widowed! I wish you well! Thank you! Mine are all friends, or friends with mutual friends. Bachelor #1 is a LEO in my city, and Bachelor #2 was an LEO that worked for the same PD as my LH. Most of the men who contact me are policemen, firemen, dispatchers, or high school classmates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 It's strange how friend requests are linked to people on dating sites. Never liked the "oh I heard you were widowed" lines. Like I came into a huge amount of money. Take away the debt, not as pretty as I thought. I have received friend requests from widowers, but I never accept them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momtojandj Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 So , I have had a guy that I went out with on a drink meet and greet , 2 years ago ..send me a message on match, and acted like he didn't know me. Then I have an Instagram friend request from a guy I exchanged cell numbers with, to have him just start flaking so I never went out to meet him. Then there's a guy I chatted with online the other night, on a free site that said he's rich and a lawyer . Um ok .. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted February 3, 2017 Share Posted February 3, 2017 Announcing that you're a rich lawyer make the person a little pretentious and maybe a little unbelievable but I still believe that rich( well at least well off) people will use the free sites. I know a couple of rich people in real life, that use POF.......but I've also talked to some that I definitely felt were scammers and they all seemed to be claiming the well off status Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Needytoo Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 Joined Match last weekend and sent out some messages. Not one of them has been read, I bet you they haven't paid their membership. I find that annoying. I will send out a few more messages this weekend and see what happens. Had a widower contact me on POF and ask me a bunch of questions about how long I have been doing online dating and how do I find it. I was honest. He is very interested in a long term relationship. See what happens there. What do you do with the "repeaters" that act like they don't know who you are? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 I've had no success with match but I think it's very regional which sites are most popular. As far as repeaters......I think I could be guilty of being a repeat messenger..... If you've been on and off the sites it doesn't keep a record of who you've spoken to. If the person changes their main photo , it might be hard to remember. If I'd met the person, you'd hope that it would be memorable enough ..... If I was contacted by a repeat messenger that originally just kinda faded out and there was no redflag disconnect I'd start talking again. I think sometimes l've let go of an ok lead to persue a more intriguing lead but if that fizzles I wanted to revisit the other one... so I give other people the benefit of the doubt and let them converse again,( that is as long as they didn't give me a rude brush off or whatever the first time) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted February 4, 2017 Author Share Posted February 4, 2017 Good luck with Match. I personally did not find it any better. If you signed up for 6 months, try and follow their rules so you can at least get the free additional 6 months if you need them. Lots of unreads and no responses, lots of same men that were on the free sites. Some different men. Scammers too, just like the free sites. I did connect with a familiar widower, in a very funny way, on there though. That alone was worth the rest of the craziness. As for the repeaters, if your pictures are new, I would expect that. If they are flipping through hundreds or more pictures, they won't remember. If it's someone you want to persue, ignore it, chat with them like they are new, and and see what happens. If it's not someone you want to persue, you can call them on it if you are in that kind of mood! 😁 Those conversations have been quite entertaining! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted February 4, 2017 Author Share Posted February 4, 2017 Klim, You would think Match would be good in our area. Go figure! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted February 4, 2017 Author Share Posted February 4, 2017 Momtojandj..... If I have met a repeater in person before though, and they claimed not to remember me, then that would be a no way! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arneal Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 I agree with you that Match seems hit or miss. I had no luck whatsoever with it and I'm in Southern California -- you'd think with all the people that live in this area, something would have hit. My city is over 200,000+ by itself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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