Tatianakm Posted September 24, 2016 Share Posted September 24, 2016 Fuck that the only place I feel peaceful at is at the cemetery, near his tomb, close to him Fuck that I feel out of place and that I don't belong anywhere else Fuck that I can't find any connection to anything or anyone despite of how hard I push myself Fuck that i tried so desperate to hold it together that now I am in physical pain from the constant pressure and tension Fuck my stupid heart for still being so in love with him...and my mind for not grasping that he is never coming back... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MFed420 Posted September 30, 2016 Share Posted September 30, 2016 Fuck the wives who think you want their husbands. I'm grieving, not interested in your man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoVerySad Posted September 30, 2016 Share Posted September 30, 2016 Fuck the wives who think you want their husbands. I'm grieving, not interested in your man. Yes, what is with that? It is incredibly annoying. I'm sorry you are experiencing it as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InOverMyHead Posted October 10, 2016 Share Posted October 10, 2016 Fuck the multiple anxiety attacks everyday.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoVerySad Posted October 10, 2016 Share Posted October 10, 2016 InOverMyHead, I'm sending you a tight hug. I experienced those anxiety attacks as well. I had no idea they could be so debilitating or would feel so awful. I hope you will find some relief from them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tjones Posted October 12, 2016 Share Posted October 12, 2016 Fuck you Subaru commercial, he didn't survive! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustLola Posted October 12, 2016 Share Posted October 12, 2016 Fuck people who ask me how I am then interrupt me when I try to tell them. Fuck having to move back to a city I now hate because I couldn't stay in one I loved. Fuck losing not only my husband and closest friend, but our dreams and hopes as a couple. Fuck that he was taken from me just when I thought we finally got everything we wanted. Fuck that he will never again be able to tell me what to do and how to do it, that I won't be irritated and then realize he was right. Fuck seeing the picture I found today on his phone, a selfie taken late in his illness that was filled with so much pain and despair. Fuck how sick he was at the end, more images that are had to get out of my head. Fuck. this. shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InOverMyHead Posted October 12, 2016 Share Posted October 12, 2016 Fuck you Subaru commercial, he didn't survive! Tjones that's how I feel about the PE Blood Clot Medication commericials.. with Chris Bosh and Arnold Palmer and everyone.. It sucks! Every time the commercial comes on I change the channel. #Itdidntwork Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InOverMyHead Posted October 12, 2016 Share Posted October 12, 2016 Fuck losing not only my husband and closest friend, but our dreams and hopes as a couple. Fuck that he was taken from me just when I thought we finally got everything we wanted. This. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted October 13, 2016 Author Share Posted October 13, 2016 Those stupid PE commercials make me cringe and change channels too. Kevin Nealon can bite me. Fuck being miserable. I'm so fucking sick of it, but I don't know how not to be. Fuck loneliness, fuck being skin starved, fuck having no dreams anymore. Fuck knowing that the only person who can take care of me is me. Fuck being alone even when I'm with other people. Fuck it all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoVerySad Posted October 16, 2016 Share Posted October 16, 2016 Fuck that despite my efforts to re-engage with the world again and meeting quite a few new people, I can sit at a table with 9 other lovely people listening to a musician who I love to hear sing and still feel so lonely for my husband. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted October 16, 2016 Author Share Posted October 16, 2016 Fuck that all I want is brownies, but my first thought is, I can't have brownies, because fat, rapidly ageing widows need to try to maintain some semblance of self-control and at least attempt to be healthy and fit. And my second thought is, Fuck that, I can eat all the damn brownies I want because I am a fat, rapidly ageing widow, and nobody is ever, ever, ever going to want me anyway. :'( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted November 2, 2016 Share Posted November 2, 2016 Jen totally want the same brownies!!!....and chocolate bars...and fries instead of salad!!~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrskro Posted November 2, 2016 Share Posted November 2, 2016 Fuck that today I'm the same age as him instead of almost 3 years younger Fuck the friend that said well not quite he was almost 44. Yeah by 37 days Not the point Fuck the friends that face timed me on vacation and said I could join them next year if I got a boyfriend. Fuck birthdays Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted November 3, 2016 Share Posted November 3, 2016 Fuck the friend that said well not quite he was almost 44. Yeah by 37 days Not the point Fuck the friends that face timed me on vacation and said I could join them next year if I got a boyfriend. So sorry Mrs Kro. Fuck insensitive friends who say BS things. I hope your birthday was okay, all things considered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kjs1989 Posted November 5, 2016 Share Posted November 5, 2016 Fuck the electrician, plumber, carpenter, and mechanic buddies of my husband who said, "If you need anything call." My husband left several small household fixes undone. I had a door that wouldn't latch, a leaky faucet, a broken porch light, and a boat and lawn mower that needed winterized. I told these guys how much it would help me if they could get these things done for me. Well, never happened. But, come every October and November I hear from these guys because I have 200 acres of prime hunting ground rife with pheasants and ducks and they are itching to get out there. I have always been too much of a pushover to say no, but this year I said..."Umm...no...not this year." I felt bad. I really did. But...I got over it.... because I said yes to the neighbor who fixed my lawn mower, the friend who closed my pool, the friend who organized my garage, the friend who put up security lights for me, and the friend that fixed my car brake light. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted November 9, 2016 Share Posted November 9, 2016 Fuck ensuing market turmoil. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrskro Posted November 9, 2016 Share Posted November 9, 2016 Right there with you Canadiangirl. Fuck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoVerySad Posted November 9, 2016 Share Posted November 9, 2016 Fuck not having my husband here to wrap his arms around me and tell me we're going to be okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Portside Posted November 9, 2016 Share Posted November 9, 2016 Fuck ensuing market turmoil. Last I checked: DJIA, S&p, NASDAQ all up big time now. What a ride from down 7% to up 3% in 12 hours. Always, always, always invest for the long term. Forget about short-term, and especially daily, volatility. Mike Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsDan Posted November 28, 2016 Share Posted November 28, 2016 Fuck fuck fuck fuck fucking fibro. Fuck this pain that is so excruciating I cannot fucking stand it. Fuck looking like a hundred years old when I try to walk. Fuck this this fucking hurts!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mbanyard Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 I am so glad I found this thread today.....deep breath. Fuck all those people who said they were there for me and to ask for anything t all, anytime, because they clearly meant just up to the point of the funeral. Fuck the so called friends who never call, never check up and never have time to spend time together, for they think I'm so strong I can do it alone. Fuck the family members on my side, who think liking a post on Facebook means they are being supportive. Fuck the family members on his side, for leaving me completely alone because visiting is "too hard for them| Fuck the car lease people, who made me spend my hard earned money to prove to them that my DH had nothing to his name, with which to pay out their fucking lease. Fuck all the neighbours who could not be bothered to even express their condolence on my loss, even though my DH did all kinds of thing to help them. Fuck the asshole boss of my, now former job, who thought it was acceptable to yell and scream at a bereaved widow because I could not focus 110% two weeks after losing my husband. Fuck those people who flirt with you, and make you think that you might actually not end up alone for the rest of your life, only to find out that you were being used to make the person they really wanted to date jealous. Fuck not having the one person in the world who understands you still by your side. and Fuck the roller coaster of emotions, the lack of drive, the lack of future plan, and the fucking insomnia that has me up at 1:15 a.m. (again). Ah...that feels better.......great thread all! Thank you. MB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kjs1989 Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 I am so sorry, mbanyard. Right there with you, I drift along and then it all builds up, like the shit going on in my life right now, which is so completely overwhelming I can't even post about it right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mbanyard Posted December 7, 2016 Share Posted December 7, 2016 Thanks! Today is a little better, but yesterday just needed a complete re-do. MB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barney_12 Posted December 12, 2016 Share Posted December 12, 2016 This could be long....I haven't really gotten any fuck you's out yet.... Fuck that after finally healing after a divorce caused by my cheating ex husband, I finally found the man I was supposed to have found 20 years ago and then love the rest of my life to have him die 3 months into our amazingly healthy loving relationship. Fuck that his cheating ex- wife decided to take on the martyrd widow role even though they had been separated for 6 mths by then and she still had the boyfriend she had cheated with. Fuck his family for allowing that bullshit and writing her as his wife in the obituary causing confusion and gossip in this shitty little town. Potentially tarmishing his reputation and playing into the " good Christian family image facade". Fuck the so called fake friends who had nothing but terrible things to say about the cheating ex wife but are now best friends with her, now that he's gone. So much for loyalty. Fuck people telling me to have compassion for her with what she's going through. Fuck that. She would have had my compassion and respect if she had done the right thing when he died. Instead of milking all the attention and sympathy because now instead of the town hating her for betraying him , they now feel for her and use their kids as excuses. Fuck a lot people not understanding my grief. Minimizing and not validating it. Fuck her for saying things about him while he's not here to defend himself. Like he neglected her etc that's why she had an affair instead of just leaving. Fuck that our future plans won't ever happen. Fuck us sharing our future grandchildren together. Me dying at 101 and him at 87 so we wouldn't be alone without the other. Fuck that I will never marry him. I will never move in with him. I won't grow old with him. Fuck that we were in the middle of being in love and it was ripped away. Fuck that Sunday morning I had a boyfriend and by 5pm I no longer had one. Fuck that once again I have to start over when I have no desire to but don't want to be alone the rest of my life either. Fuck that i have already lost my mom, my stepdad, my favourite grandma, my marriage, my in-laws ( since they chose to picks sides) and then him....my chance of having a family again. Fuck that once again I'll be spending Christmas alone. Fuck that my tree has been up for 2 weeks with only lights on it and I can't decide if I'm going to decorate the fucking thing or just take it down. Fuck that he was the most amazing beautiful sexy loving faithful honest respectful man I had ever met and in one fucking split moment he crossed the yellow line on his motorbike and hit another car. Fuck that he only had a broken leg and a lacerated liver but died because they couldnt get a helicopter or plane to fly him to a better equipped hospital because another accident had happened and they were flying " non life threatening " injuries to a different city. Fuck me for saying this and feeling terrible but fuck him for dying on me and leaving me here to deal with all of this shit and have to once again start over. Just fuck. Fuck fuckity fuck..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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